It's All Relative

Everyone's heard the analogy of the frog in the boiling water. If you drop a frog in water that's already boiling it will hop right out. If you put the frog in the water then slowly raise the heat it will stay in the pot until it's cooked alive.

When it comes to the chaos of my classroom I sometimes feel the same way. If a random observer were to walk into my classroom they would probably shocked and appalled by what they saw. For me, I've become acclimated to it. Even a "good" day like today probably wouldn't impress anyone, but me? I'll take what I can get.

I don't get too angry with the kids anymore. At least not at the end of the day when I'm reflecting on what went right and wrong. I just get angry at myself and the situation, because I know there's a limited amount of time and we are not using what little time we have. I want my students to learn, because I can see a future for them that they can't. It will be one of two paths and this is my only shot to guide them towards the one that leads to college and hope.

In the meantime I'll take my "good" days when I get them. Even if they're not true successes. The other day walking my class down the stairwell I heard the voice of another teacher screaming, "Shut up!" And this was a veteran teacher! I felt horrible for her class and (I'm sorry to say) relieved that maybe I'm not completely incompetent, relative to the other teachers at my school.


ahnka said…
I enjoy reading your posts so much. They make me think to myself, "I am not alone!"

I guess I am the frog that took too long to realize the water started to boil.
I'm sure what seems purely chaotic to someone else is progress in my eyes, heh!
On the worst days, I think my students exist in some sound-proof force field where they scream & yell, verbally & physically assault each other, and I'm crazy for trying to penetrate it. It's like the more I try, the more they resent me. I just want them to... adjust to this society. Right now, most of them don't stand a chance.
But then there are hose rare occasions when they're all engaged in an assignment...or when they self-correct their own behavior. And there's no greater feeling in the world.

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